DEAR NO ONE BY TORI KELLY [Of Life Theme Songs]

 

Music is a universal language. I have found myself  listening to Tori Kelly's Dear No one. Mostly because it speaks to the place I am in time, I am sold out to just sitting with being alone enough to have conversations with myself, do the work and get to know me without trying to find solace in someone, or something.

It is a classic vibe of breaking cracked foundations and building stronger ones. Tori's song speaks for rest, rest in knowing that in the moment all one can do is to be about the business that makes you thrive while you wait to partner with someone. 

I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. This is a dedication to all single people, who have chosen to focus a little closer on who they are before the person. 

"Dear No One"

I like being independent
Not so much of an investment
No one to tell me what to do

I like being by myself
Don't gotta entertain anybody else
No one to answer to.

But sometimes I just want somebody to hold
Someone to give me their jacket when it's cold
Got that young love even when we're old

Yeah, sometimes I want someone to grab my hand
Pick me up, pull me close, be my man
I will love you 'til the end

So if you're out there I swear to be good to you
But I'm done lookin' for my future someone
'Cause when the time is right you'll be here,
But for now, dear No One,
This is your love song
Ooh, oh, oh

I don't really like big crowds
I tend to shut people out
I like my space, yeah

But I'd love to have a soul mate
And God'll give him to me someday
And I know it'll be worth the wait,
Oh

So if you're out there I swear to be good to you
But I'm done lookin', I'm done lookin' for my future someone
'Cause when the time is right you'll be here,
But for now, dear No One
Dear Nobody
This is your love song
Ooh, ooh

Sometimes I just want somebody to hold
Someone to give me their jacket when it's cold
Got that young love even when we're old

Yeah, sometimes I want someone to grab my hand
Pick me up, pull me close, be my man
I will love you 'til the end

So if you're out there I swear to be good to you
But I'm done lookin', I'm done lookin' for my future someone
'Cause when the time is right you'll be here,
But for now, dear No One, dear Nobody
This is your love song
This is your love song

Dear No One, no need to be searchin', no
Dear No One.
Dear No One.
Dear No One, this is your love song

DEAR NO ONE

THE HEARTBREAK OF ALMOST(S)

Maybe it is just me but if it is happening in my world, it is probably happening in other worlds and in other lives. The presence of "almost"

The prolonged episodes of "almosts", almost made it, almost got the money, almost got the relationship, almost finished first. Don't get me wrong, I am aware of the blessings around and I am in the constant presence of thankfulness for the living present.

But these past few days have reminded me of the heartache that comes with almost having it and almost getting there in a lot of things in life. "It is such a cruel joke that the universe plays on us. One day, someone seems like a constant in your life. The next, they’re gone." 

I think we break our own hearts when we work far beyond the realities before us, but I also think hope is one ally that can drag us ahead of our realities. I am learning in my "almosts" not to count my chicks before they hatch,  I am learning the hard way but learning anyway. 

"And then, they remain a part of you—as a regret, a curiosity, a memory, remembered only as the name that pops up in laughter-brimming conversations with your old friends, or a song that you hear on the radio while you’re driving through the backroads in the October rain, or a familiar move of the boy who you could not have.. a reminder that sometimes, we just not have want we desire."

How to reconcile the gaps of questions you will never dare to ask, the affections you never got to share and the flood of what-ifs? that swam you from time to time. The universe will always play the game of the unknowns...the universe itself is the placement of unknowns. 

"Because how do you get closure from something that never burst open in the first place? How do you let go of something that was never in your grasp, someone who was never yours to hold? How could you? How could you move on? When it never ended because it never began." 

The “what if’s” imbue our minds. First, it’s complete and utter inundation, our almost love pervading our minds absolutely and destroying them heedlessly. And though its aftershock may seem subtle, it's always far more painful than the catastrophe, itself. You pick through every conversation you ever had, every lingering glance, every remark that was, in the slightest bit, ambiguous (and if it isn’t open to interpretation, you pry it open to search for meaning).

You wonder what you could have changed to get the ending you wanted. Maybe if the two of you were more emotionally available. Maybe if the two of you had met just a few months down the line. Maybe if you weren’t so afraid to ruin a good thing in order to chase a potentially great thing. Probably not, but who knows? That’s the thing—you don’t.

You don’t know.

That’s why almost relationships hurt more than the ones that tried and failed. Because even though the relationship wasn’t real, everything else was.

Because, despite everything, there will always be the knowledge in the back of our minds that, in some alternate universe, they wanted us back. Because we become addicted to the times in our lives when the person we (almost) loved gave us everything we ever wanted or even for a moment..they seemed to like what we wanted. Because there is still that faintest flicker of hope.

I am such a sucker for the unrequited love, the unfinished endings, the almost relationships. It’s foolish and irrational, but we can’t help it. It’s simply a part of being human. It means to wonder. To want. To aspire, and be utterly insatiable. It means to have hope. 

I hope that you learn to move from the pain of not starting, from the pain of feeling your heart burn out a starting fire...but most importantly, I pray that the stars will align someday and give you a chance to have your heart seen and chosen for a lifetime. For now...we heal.

Strengthening democracy is a civic burden for all

https://www.monitor.co.ug/uganda/oped/commentary/strengthening-democracy-is-a-civic-burden-for-all-3550584

 As we commemorate the International Day of Democracy, Ugandan democracy is 

under threat. Many Ugandans are willing to compromise on democratic principles for 

partisan goals. Some are even willing to resort to violence to help their side win. 

Extreme dislike for the other side has grown significantly in recent decades, and may 

also erode commitments to democratic principles. 

There are other issues rising in our society that are threatening the survival of democracy. 

The National Unity Party, which is the leading opposition party in parliament, recently refused to join the Inter-Party Organization for Dialogue (IPOD) on grounds of lack of equal partnership for the participating political parties, their narrative is that, there is a lack of autonomy of the institution with more stronghold coming from the ruling party. 

The onslaught of killings in the greater Masaka area that are marred in a blame game of political favoritism and patronage. The loss of two and half years in the education cycle for learners in Uganda, with nothing but a promise of an act of God in the future of schools opening from the Minister of Education. And above it all, the mis-management of the Covid-19 relief funds.

All these incidences speak to a struggling democracy. The anti-democratic attitudes, support for partisan violence, and extreme levels of partisan animosity have troubling consequences for democracy. Uganda is struggling with weak democracy, inadequate capacity in many state institutions and lack of respect for human rights.

Democracy is built on inclusion, equal treatment and participation is a fundamental building block for peace, sustainable development and human rights. 

True democracy is a two-way street, built on constant dialogue among all stake holders. Civic participation, civic space and social dialogue make up the very foundations of good governance and therefore, should be espoused. 

Democracy, good governance and accountability are development priorities clearly stipulated in Uganda’s National Development Plan. These concepts are also core values envisioned in the 1995 constitution and the decentralisation programme. 

Nevertheless, realising genuine democracy, good governance and accountability remain stifled by low levels of citizen participation, limited levels of awareness and appreciation of democratic principles by the leaders and citizens.

Meaningful democracy is built around the hallmarks of active citizen engagement, inclusion and equal treatment. 

Amidst the rising tide of threats to democracy, it is critical to continuously nurture an environment where citizens have the power to genuinely determine by whom, and how, they are governed. And upholding the truth that democracy flourishes when people feel represented and able to freely substantively participate in the political affairs of their society.

Therefore, as we pursue a collective future for the Uganda we want, through civic engagement and participation beyond elections, more Ugandans will understand the relationship between their participation and strengthening democracy.  Our collective efforts should be concerted towards a flourishing multi-party democracy anchored in respect to the tenets of good governance. And that is the mandate of every Uganda for such a time as we find ourselves.

Ms Tricia Gloria Nabaye is a resident research associate, Great Lakes Institute for Strategic Studies.

Vaccinate Uganda: The secret to our resilience to COVID-19

https://www.monitor.co.ug/uganda/oped/letters/vaccination-is-the-secret-to-our-resilience-3493684

If Uganda doesn’t vaccinate Ugandans, the pandemic will continue. According to the Minister for Health, Dr. Achieng Ruth, “we are not responding to the pandemic at the speed that we should”, wealthy countries are hoarding the vaccines and yet because of its global impact, COVID-19 ideally should be treated on a global response other than single-nation response. If countries do not start sharing the excess supply that is available, the pandemic will continue and will come with new variants.

COVAX an international consortium comprising of the World Health Organisation and UNICEF have a goal to distribute two billion vaccines by the end of 2021. The COVAX facility is an initiative that provides developing nations with access to vaccines. It is expected to cover only 10 percent of the population with essential workers of first priority. Therefore, developing countries have to find alternative sources for the vaccines in order to continue the drive to herd immunity.

In March 2021, 864,000 doses of COVID-19 vaccine arrived in Uganda. Amidst many challenges in Uganda, the task under the COVAX team was to vaccinate essential workers across Uganda. The doses were enough to vaccinate 425,000 people which is under one percent of the population. Uganda still needs millions of doses to hit the target of vaccinating the majority of its population and that is where our efforts as a country should be concerted for the next months to have herd immunity for the pandemic to be brought under control.

As a country, we need to rally our efforts around vaccination. While other nations are going back to live as normal, for us we are in our houses hiding from the virus. The world is certainly moving on and leaving us in a pandemic that was not our making and all of a sudden it feels like the HIV/AIDS era yet again. We can do something about it so that we can achieve at least 70 percent vaccination levels for life to go back to normal.

The pandemic is quickly becoming an African problem, not just at a national level but even globally. Africa is quickly being sunk into a corner where we will be fighting this pandemic in isolation, travel bans will remove us from the global connectivity and yet again stay at the mercy of countries whose medicine has advanced enough for them to produce more than enough vaccines for their citizens.

 With the allegation of Ugandans getting water instead of the actual vaccine, fears grow for our population as to when we will be able to get genuine vaccines so that we can leverage our immunity and health in the presence of the pandemic. We need to objectively look for solutions that will ensure that life can go on and Ugandans can go back to working and building the economy. Otherwise, we risk losing more Ugandans to the coronavirus and also crippling the economy with total business shutdowns while using lockdowns as the remedial measure other than mass vaccination.

 

Tricia Gloria Nabaye

Resident Research Associate: GREAT LAKES INSTITUTE FOR STRATEGIC STUDIES