I remember the start of last year so vividly, partly because it is the same way I always start a year. In an "all night sing" gathering of believers. But I remember it so well because I also had only three prayer topics tabled before God. A job, Masters and Marriage. The problem then was that, that was all that looked like was left to achieve. I had finished my degree in Development Studies and was at the prime of life...so all that was to show up was these three.
A job did surface and I started to work surely, I am still working and while the masters didn't materialise into starting, I did make progress in that direction to earn myself if the best was to come, a scholarship to go and pursue my masters. I also made visible steps into meeting people and dating (That was one hard one, its hard to share your life with someone) But I was in the centre of everything I had tabled before the Lord, yet the year ended on the low for me. I had not seen a fulfilment of any of my prayer lines(or so I thought).
In the midst of beating myself up, I realised how wrong I was viewing these three large prayer topics, It brought me back to the fact I was underestimating God and desiring my will to be done. Every dream has a season like the great Chinese bamboo and these are some of those kinds of dreams. I realised that I needed to water my dreams and prayer topics for a while until they burst forth to fruition and this gave me an insight into the things God does in our lives. In haste to see our dreams come to life, we miss to enjoy the process to the desired end.
For the first time, I knew God was up to something big, these years where the start of something great in my life, sure I might miss it many times. But a dreams only dies if it is not watered and it is given up on. A dream is always a dream for as long as one desires to have it nurtured. Nurtured in prayer and in patience.(it sure is hard to wait). I have had many times of chocking tears, knowing that the situation is having my hands tied and I can do nothing to change it. I have had days, where I wondered if anything right will happen for me, but only to be brought back to the fact that, a lot has happened this far to show how much success I have seen through the days I have had on earth.
There is something big happening in the background of my life, and so for 2016 I maintained the same key verse for my life direction as that of 2015, I feel the Lord still has a lot of instruction and learning to give to me. I will set my pace around the Lord, without giving up on my prayer topics, I hope to use the time of waiting to get prepared for so much more than I can think and ever imagine. I will wait because the season promises a better return. The season smells of hope and living hope at that. That is how I have chosen to travel through 2016.
I beseech you, you who is reading, yes, you will despair, I have many times. Yes, you will cry and weep, I have many times. Yes, you will want to let the dream go, I have many times but one thing through it all, please do not lose hope. The tunnel sure has an opening(it always has) so sit in the darkness until the train of life gets to the open air. Because wherever you are,it is the start of something big.
